My Blue Eyed Girl

My first born child turns 14 years old today. Two birthdays in one week makes for a whole lot of cake, wrapping paper and fun!

What to say about my eldest daughter? "Eyes of blue with a will of iron, too" is an apt description. When I think back 14 years I remember how unprepared I was to care for a child. Not that we hadn't wanted a child. We had, desperately. After years of thinking that we didn't want children our thoughts on the subject did an about face. Only to discover that getting pregnant was not as easy as we had imagined. How do teenagers get knocked up in the back of cars? I ended up having 2 surgeries for adhesions and after trying for another year resorted to infertility treatments. Only a woman who has gone through it knows about basal body temperature charts, planned intercourse, anxious waiting and then the crushing disappointment when your period arrives. We were very lucky in that I got pregnant on my third round of Pergonal and even though there were 3 eggs only one implanted. The one who grew into my amazing daughter.

Nothing came easily in the beginning with Samantha. She wanted to nurse constantly. Around the clock. I had thought that I would be sleeping again after months of peeing every 2 hours. What a shock that was! "What do you mean you're hungry AGAIN!!!" Add to that our move to Portland when she was 6 weeks old and I am surprised that I retained my sanity. But she thrived. And grew and grew and grew. She now has size 10 feet and when I hug her I don't have to bend down.


Samantha is the first born daughter of a first born daughter of a first born daughter of an only child, a daughter. Did you get all that? She is also my test child. I have tried out many parenting techniques on her. Some I still use. Some failed...but she survived. As she enters her teen years I am still blindly finding my way. I hold tight in my faith that love will lead me and that she is a forgiving soul.

Samantha set the bar high for her younger sisters and brother. She walked and talked at a year. She could draw a face, a real face, at 2 years old. She read Harry Potter in Kindergarten. Don't all children do these things? As my younger children passed these milestones in their own time and style I realized that measuring one against the other was not healthy. They all have their special gifts and talents. Samantha just happens to be first in line to reach each milestone. A burden and a challenge.

Up until her Dad moved out Samantha would declare that every day was "The best day of my life." She drinks experiences into her being. They return later as a painting, a poem or a story. She is an introvert in a loud, boisterous family. She is a patient and loving older sister. She is my "will eat anything" child and a budding cook. She was the child who invented to term "Mommyish". As in "I feel Mommyish and need to sit on your lap." She still swoops in for many hugs and kisses per day.

As she prepares to enter high school next year there is one bit of wisdom I wish to pass on. Darling, don't define yourself too narrowly. Yes, you are a reader, an artist, a writer and a sister. But you may also be an athlete, a best friend, and a leader. Do not limit yourself. You can go as far and do as much as your passion and determination will take you.

I could go on and on but I won't. Let me end by saying that she is a joy to parent. Watching her grow up is pure fun.

She is a blessing.

Happy Birthday Sweetheart!

I love you.

(And I am truly sorry that your birthday morning was ruined when your sister threw her roast beef sandwich at your brother's head.)